Former Home and Away star Christie Hayes on the emotional moment her non-verbal son said ‘I love you mummy’
Radio host Christie Hayes has a simple wish - that society can be a bit kinder to families and children navigating the world of neurodivergence.
For beloved Aussie actress and radio host Christie Hayes, May has been a whirlwind. But amidst making national headlines for grilling Prime Minister Anthony Albanese on what he’s doing to combat Australia’s domestic violence problem, the former Home and Away star has been channelling her energy into a cause closest to her heart: the Walk for Autism.
Stepping out to raise awareness, Christie opened up to Woman’s Day about her beautiful 11-year-old son, Hendrix (affectionately known as Hendy), who lives with Autism Level 3. Reflecting on his growth, Christie shares the milestones that make her proudest as a mum, reminding us all of the power of unconditional love.
Christie Hayes on the milestones that matter
“I remember when he was four and he said ‘mum’,” Christie told Woman’s Day. “I remember when he was about seven it started to turn into ‘mummy’ and when he was about 10, it was a very kind of difficult to understand, but I could get the idea of him repeating me when I said ‘I love you’ and he’d say, ‘I love you mummy’. That one, as any mother can understand, was probably one that has and always will stay with me.
While Hendrix is largely non-verbal, Christie emphasises that a lack of speech does not equate to a lack of substance.
“I see milestones every day where I think wow, just because he can’t speak doesn’t mean he doesn’t have so much to say,” she said. “Being able to recognise that even though we can live in a world where there is limited speech or someone we love is nonverbal, it doesn’t mean that they’re not capable of incredible things.”
Christie said her most important role as a mum is to be a voice for her son, and others living with autism.
“`My role as Hendy’s mum is to be his voice, because he doesn’t have one all the time,” she said. “And to be a voice for anyone who needs support with living with autism.”
Navigating Hendrix’s autism diagnosis
Like many parents, Christie’s journey into the world of neurodiversity began with a learning curve. As a first-time mum, she initially didn’t know what signs to look for. It was her own mother, an educator, who gently suggested an assessment.
“I noticed that it’s not that he was regressing, it’s just that he wasn’t progressing,” Christie recalled. “He started to say a few words, but then it stopped … I didn’t actually know what I was looking for. You don’t know what you’re looking for until you know to look for it.”
While well-meaning friends would tell her, “Don’t worry, I’m sure he doesn’t have autism,” Christie believes society needs to shift away from treating a diagnosis like a tragedy.
“I know that those people meant well, but I really think nowadays we get rid of that terminology that ‘don’t worry he won’t have it’ like it’s a bad thing,” she said.
“I won’t pretend like it’s a bed of roses when you find out your child is different, and in my case, my son has an intellectual disability with his autism. Of course it’s difficult, and you will grieve the loss that you expected your child to have, but there are so many places that we can go with the discovery of the diagnosis and how we can support people out there that need encouragement.”
Christie’s wish for kindness for neurodivergent kids
As Hendrix navigates his world, whether it’s his tech-savvy nature or burgeoning photography skills, Christie has stopped apologising for his neurodivergent joy.
“I used to apologise a lot, but the older I got I just went, ‘No, we shouldn’t have to apologise for our child’s behaviour’. So long as they’re obviously not hurting anyone… children with autism are allowed to make noise. They’re allowed to squeal. They’re allowed to be their unique self.”
“I hope society can be a little kinder… just letting people live their life and not judging people just because they sound different or they look different is what I welcome from society.”
Ultimately, Christie has one simple, beautiful hope for Hendy’s future:
“Honestly, I just hope to see Hendy happy. Whatever that looks like.”
Christie’s Dream Home and Away Return!
While Christie’s primary focus is advocacy, she also has high hopes for a return to her creative roots… with a meaningful twist.
Christie revealed she would gladly head back to Summer Bay if the opportunity arose, and she already has the perfect, groundbreaking storyline in mind for her iconic character, Kirsty Sutherland.
“[Kirsty] was always outspoken and feisty. I thought maybe she could be a lawyer, or even maybe we realise and explore with her that her own son is on the spectrum. I thought it could be a nice way of including something that happens to so many people in this world and in Australia especially, and have that nice representation on screen.”
